Bittersweet Me

WHY JURI?

Perhaps you are wondering why I chose to enshrine Juri? Well,  see the reasons below: 

Juri is a character close to my heart, for we share a strong disbelief in miracles and the miraculous. We are bitter, cold, and hard. We keep our true selves frrom the world, and only our closest friends and family are privy to any warmth.

Please look around the site, and enjoy. Hopefully, you will find something of interest here. May you go away feeling fulfilled. That, at least, is a feeling Juri and myself can never have....

 

INSPIRATION: The song that inspired the name of this site: 

BITTERSWEET ME: BY R.E.M.

I move across, innocence lost
all flashing pulsar
I move across the earth in my new pattern shirt
I pass satellites.

"You're so bitter," your complaint
I can't give you anything.
I don't know who you're livin for
I don't who you are anymore.

I'd sooner chew my leg off,
Than be trapped in this.
How easy you think of all of this as bittersweet me

I couldn't taste it
I'm tired and naked.
I don't know what I'm hungry for
I don't know what I want anymore

I move across, candy floss
I move like a tank
I move across the room
with a heart full of gloom,
stronger than you think.

Oh my peer,
your veneer is wearing thin and cracking.
the surface informs that underneath,
underneath is lacking.

I'd sooner chew my leg off,
Than be trapped in this.
How easy you think of all of this as bittersweet me

I couldn't taste it.
I'm tired and naked.
I don't know what I'm hungry for.
I don't know what I want anymore.

You move across, innocence lost,
all static and desire,
you're blue in the face from navel gaze,
you set yourself on fire.

You strip down and lay yourself out,
I know you can't fake it,
But are you tired and naked?
Are you tire and naked?

I'd sooner chew my leg off,
Than be trapped in this.
How easy you think of all of this as bittersweet me

I couldn't taste it
I'm tired and naked.
I don't know what I'm hungry for.
I don't know what I want anymore.

 

Juri's Stats and Story:

(taken from various websites)

STATISTICS:

 Name : Arisugawa Juri
Name Meaning: "A glass tree, surrounded by life"
Nickname (manga): Beautiful Panther
Nickname (movie): The Prince
Age: 16
Grade: 10th
Birthday: December 1st
Blood Type: A
Rose Color: Orange "Desire and Passion"
Sword: Rapier
Sign: Sagittarius
Birthstone:Tanzanite, Zircon or Turquoise
Voice: Kotono Mitsuishi / Mandy Bonhomme
 

STORY

Most people see Juri as an unapproachable ideal, which is pretty much true. There are very few people she treats with any sense of friendliness or kindness. That isn't to say that she is mean because she usually isn't. She is just aloof and formal. She has a strong presence, which imminently commands respect from students and teachers alike. If you stick purely to the surface, she dominates everything around her.  Her main talent is with the sword. She is able to defeat long lines of opponents with her superior skill. Juri makes thrusting the sword an act of poetry. There is a beautiful tension between her logical, calculated form and fiery passion that makes her the best. Only her trainer Ruka matches her skill and even Utena is only able to defeat her through circumstances. Rather than humble, Juri is confident.  She is also very beautiful. Her green, piercing eyes seem to see the world as something entirely hers, as though she can control anything. Her hair is the envy of many of her fans. Pulled back or falling off her shoulders, Juri's golden curls make her one of the most beautiful ladies at Ohtori. Her beauty isn't that of a young girl, but rather that of a mature, sophisticated woman. She is equally lovely in motion and in thoughtful repose. The way she carries herself and the way she talks reveals her great intelligence. If people listen to her because she sounds like she knows what she is talking about, it is because she does. She is very witty at times and she can see through a situation to the facts of the matter.  Unfortunately she has a secret love for her best friend. A person who could never match her, Shiori not only doesn't love her back, but also resents her. Instead of chasing after her or flirting with her, Juri hides her feelings and Shiori does her best to betray Juri any way she can. She tries to hurt her by stealing their other friend who she believes Juri likes. The act hurts Juri, not because she actually liked the boy, but because it revealed Shiori's feelings for her. When she does find out about Juri's feelings, she titters between the joy of having power over Juri and the disgust of knowing that a girl looks at her the same way she looks at boys.  Juri, who had hoped that Shiori could love her, tried to abandon her faith and face the world with cold cynicism, but she could not abandon her faith entirely. For one thing, there was the locket around her neck containing the picture of her beloved. On the other, there was the power of miracles. Saying that she would disprove miracles, perhaps the revolution promised in the duels would allow Shiori to return her love. She fought with all her might, but she wasn't able to beat Utena.  She rejects the love of the one who tries to free her from her desire. She fights him claiming that she must protect her friend from him (which is true since he does wish to hurt her) but she doesn't understand his efforts to give her the power of miracles. In order to grow as an individual Juri must find the strength to move on and obtain a sort of equilibrium between her exterior and her deep feelings. She must always maintain her dignity and sense of nobility. return

SHIORI,THE SECRET LOVE:

A strange girl always in the shadows moves the heart of the perpetual shining star, but the strange girl has become bitter.

Shiori and Juri were at one time close friends, but something changed. Shiori loathed herself and became jealous of Juri. Juri on the other hand watched her friend with growing adoration which blossomed into a secret love. She could not know the poison that was brewing in her love's heart until it bore a bitter fruit.

She did the one thing she thought Juri would hate her most for, but succeeded in a way she never could have imagined. Shiori stole the third friend who was in love with Juri by whispering that Juri loved someone else. She stole kisses in the dark while promising miracles to a believing heart. Ultimately that heart was broken and refused to believe in miracles again, even though it couldn't let go of its object of desire.

Juri's appearance is cold and stable, but inside she longs for her friend. She tries to deny the power of miracles, only to find a girl who wishes to be a prince and seems to attrack a powerful miracle that Juri refuses to believe in. She losses to that miracle, but only because she allowed it to happen.

Shiori discovers Juri's feelings and is both pleased and disgusted. To think that those looks are filled with that feeling is sickning, but powerful. She is in control. Shiori becomes grotestic with narcasism, finally feeling she has worth because of this new found power.

Eventually she is freed from her longing to destroy the only one who truly cares about her and Juri no longer pines away in sorrow. The two of them can be friends again, maybe even better friends than they were before.

HE WHO WOULD FREE HER,RUKA: 

What was Ruka intrusting to the power of miracles? What was the sacrifice of which he spoke? Despite his absence in the first half of the story, Ruka seems to have a very clear understanding of what is going on between Shiori and Juri. For instance, he knows that Shiori is Juri's weakness and that she will never reach her full potential until she frees herself of her binds. He also makes some keen observations as to the personality of Shiori and clearly makes very accurate predictions about her behavior that allows him to use her. More than anything, Ruka tries to pull Juri away from the lies she to which has been holding. The first lie is that she doesn't believe in miracles. If she doesn't believe in them, why does she cling so desperately to the hope of obtaining one? Of course he had to use Shiori. There was no other way to make Juri care enough, and there was no other way to free her. Perhaps he wanted to punish Shiori, or maybe he just wanted to piss the hell out of Juri (both of which he did spectacularly). Ruka calls her a sacrifice. What I wonder is whether he enjoyed hurting her or not. The point simply is that Shiori was a tool he didn't choose to use, but rather the only one that was available to him. This, of course, does not mitigate the pain he inflicted on Shiori by manipulating her. What he did to her was cruel. No one would call him "cruelly innocent". He clearly doesn't believe that he can beat Utena. He says as much before they even start. He believes that Juri can shine again and be the proud, strong woman he knows she is. The miracle he seeks is to bring back her noble spirit she let slip away through her pining for Shiori. Ruka says that Juri deserves a miracle, because she doesn't know that they come with a price. What is that price? Him. He has been sick, and really he still is sick. He sacrificed the last of his strength to fight for Juri. Unlike hurting Shiori, I'm sure he hated hurting Juri, but again he had no choice if he was going to obtain his goals. Whether that makes him any less of an ass will largely depend on how much a person is willing to forgive him for and how worthly they find his goal. Did he win? Well after the revolution, Juri seems very happy and content and even Shiori no longer seems intent on hurting Juri anymore. In sense, by losing he helped the person truly able to bring the revolution that would free Juri. I hate to think it was that limited, however. Perhaps Juri didn't understand what Ruka had wished for, but maybe the shattered locket was enough to make her aware of what she was clinging too. At any rate, Ruka's end was achieved and Juri was set fr PRINCE OF THE REVOLUTION,UTENA:  On paper, Juri and Utena appear to be quite similar. Both girls possess a sense of strength and nobility which inspires others to admire them. They rebel against the norms of their gender while still retaining a sense of femininity. Furthermore, they are both strong willed and do not back down easily from a fight, especially when convinced they are in the right. Yet, despite all of these similarities, the two girls are rivals and the animosity is mostly on Juri’s part. The reason for this, simply put, is that they are, in fact, quite similar and in a way that disturbs Juri. Utena, despite her general intelligence, possess a wide-eyed and innocent quality which can be both endearing and aggravating at the same time. She places her faith in a largely benevolent universe and believes that good will win over evil, that pain can be eased, and that princesses can be saved. Her innocence allows her to hope that one day she will become a prince and find the man who saved her years ago. Unfortunately, her trust and naiveté make her an easy target for manipulation and deceit. What bothers Juri about this quality is not so much that Utena possesses it, but that Juri once (and may still) possess the same quality, and she believes it led to her downfall. Before Shiori betrayed her and revealed her true feelings, Juri thought there might be a chance for her to reveal her love and perhaps have it returned. She believed Shiori when she said to believe in miracles. She trusted in that miracle, only to have it wilt away, like the rose Shiori once offered her. She decided to toss away her innocence, her hope, and her trust in favor of a more adult cynicism. Still, the damage was done and she could only regret ever having placed her trust in a miracle. Yet for all of her cynical posturing, deep in her heart she still longed for a miracle. She could insist all day that she would disprove the power of miracles, yet she always wore the locket with Shiori’s picture close to her heart. In spite of all of her pain and suffering, she simply could not move on. Her supposed maturity was only a mask, and a loose one at that, although she was able to fool herself with it much of the time. Then Utena enters her life, with her innocence, openness, and faith in her prince—everything against which Juri was now protesting. On the night that Utena met Juri by the water fountain and tells her the story of her prince, at first it looks like Juri will caress her tenderly until the moment when she tries to take her rose crest ring violently. She claims to hate Utena for having nobility because some prince gave it to her, but the truth is far more complicated. Really, she resents Utena for being what she used to be and hates seeing that she was once very weak. Furthermore, she hates herself for still being weak and harboring her desire for a miracle. Perhaps she is even jealous that Utena still has her innocence. Her gesture, turning a caress into a violent act, makes a powerful point—if Utena continues to be that trusting, someone will hurt her. In the duel, she taunts Utena about her prince and her miracle. It’s an argument she must have practiced often on herself in her moments of weakness when her mask slipped and she felt her heart longing for a miracle. In a sense, when she duels Utena for the first time, she is dueling the part of herself that she hates but cannot cast out. Her cynical side may be stronger and more violent, but that is not the side that wins. The side of her that still believes and wants to be proven wrong stops her from cutting Utena’s rose off right away and gives the would-be prince an extra moment to show her a miracle. Although she does not get a clear cut miracle, what she gets is enough to rattle her cynicism. Later, when Utena stumbled and lost her sense of identity after losing to Touga but struggles to take it back, it is Juri who offers her a sword. Perhaps she is simply motivated by their mutual dislike for Touga, but it seems to be a rather generous and kind act the distant and skeptical Juri. Utena is bravely facing her opponent in order to reclaim her identity. Perhaps Juri understands the struggle and wished to do the same. Their paths cross again when Shiori returns to Ohtori and tells Utena a small part of her story with Juri, In spite of not knowing the full story, Utena tries to intervene on Shiori’s behalf and suggests that Juri forgive her friend. Juri compares Utena with Shiori, claiming they are both “cruelly innocent” before telling her to mind her own business. Although Utena doesn’t realize that she is hurting Juri, her words are unintentionally cruel, but, since cannot know the truth, she also cannot be held responsible. In a way, that only makes things In the end, Juri comes to terms with Utena, and perhaps herself. She plays a friendly game with Utena and Miki and engages in some playful banter, offering to put her in her new locket. She begins to see that Utena is strong and noble, but still retains her sense of faith and trust, and even if she does get hurt, she will remain strong and noble. Juri starts to realize that her cynicism is not necessarily strength and that her faith is not necessarily weakness. In the balance, she finds maturity. For her part, Utena respects and admires Juri, both as a woman and as a fencer. She does not understand Juri very well and cannot see why they should have to fight. Still, Juri represents Utena’s struggle to mature. Can she lose her naiveté without abandoning her faith?    return   IS JURI A DIEST? Juri's lack of belief in MIracles suggests a lack of belief in God as well. In fact, all of her actions and words suggest that she may, in fact, be a Diest. To better understand thiis theory, below I have provided some information on Diesm as a whole, courtesy of Wikipedia: Deism (i /ˈdiːɪzəm/ US dict: dē′·ĭzm)[1][2] in the philosophy of religion is the standpoint that reason and observation of the natural world, without the need for organized religion, can determine that a supreme being created the universe. Further the term often implies that this supreme being does not intervene in human affairs or suspend the natural laws of the universe. Deists typically reject supernatural events such as prophecy and miracles, tending to assert that God (or "The Supreme Architect") has a plan for the universe that is not to be altered by intervention in the affairs of human life. Deists believe in the existence of God without any reliance on revealed religion, religious authority or holy books. This idea is also known as the Clockwork universe theory, in which God designs and builds the universe, but steps aside to let it run on its own. Two main forms of deism currently exist: classical deism and modern deism. So far, the first-found usage in print of the English term "deist" is 1621,[3] and "deism" is first-found in a 1675 dictionary.[4] Deism became more prominent in the 17th and 18th centuries during the Age of Enlightenment — especially in Britain, France, United States and Ireland — mostly among those raised as Christians who found they could not believe in supernatural miracles or the inerrancy of scriptures, but who did believe in one God. The Founding Fathers of the United States were heavily influenced by Enlightenment philosophies, and it is generally believed that many of them were deists.[ So, after reading up on Juri, what do YOU think? This is really only for you to decide. I am, however in love with a good debate. If you wish to share your thoughts and opinions, I am always open to hearing them. To do so, please feel free to contact me at: Usagi_Chan33@yahoo.com

Below lies poetry dedicated to Juri and her situation. Please read, and I hope you enjoy:

Miracles

You spoke of Miracles, saying they would hear me,

You brought only pain that broken love could bring,

Why can I not reveal my secret?

I suffer alone, in silence,

A locket bearing your image, that only I may see,

Why can I not speak it?

Why must I remain in silence?

I know you despise me, but as you despise, so more do I grow in my love for you

Why am I so weak?

I want to go back,

Back to the days when we were friends.

You say I must hate you for what you've done,

Yes, I hate you. Because we can never again be what we once were.

Because I can not find the strength to tell you how I feel.... 

 Chained in my Heart: What Juri's locket symbolizes:

If one wished to associate Juri with an object, one would most likely chose the locket which Juri wears close to her heart that hides her deepest secret and bitter pain. Not only does the locket serve as a devise within the story, it functions as a major part of Juri’s character development. In many ways it represents her methods of dealing with her feelings, her stagnated emotional state, and, eventually, her ability to grow up.

 The locket, first reveled in Juri’s Unfullfillment, acts as a major plot devise in all three of Juri’s major story lines. In the first chapter, the locket reveals her weakness, the reason for her ambivalence towards miracles, and the source of her unhappiness. In the second chapter, she discards the locket, only to find it returned to her in a painful manner, as the one she secretly loves learns of her feelings. This episode illustrates her ultimate inability to let go of unrequited feelings, which ultimately leaves her desperately hoping for a miracle while venomently denying that they exist. Her final two episodes explore these feelings, represented by the locket, and their resolution when the locket is broken. She desperately grasps for the pieces, showing how addicted she truly is to her self imposed misery. With the locket finally destroyed, she grieves but, more importantly, she grows up, no longer chained to her past. Although these episodes are spread apart, the locket adds continuity and succinctly reminds the viewer of Juri’s situation. 

While all of that is important, it is far more interesting to examine how the locket comes to represent Juri as a character. A locket, by its nature, is a personal object because it has an outside and an inside. The outside is often beautiful, whether it is ornate or simple, but the contents that make the locket truly special. The owner chooses to whom the lockets secrets will be displayed, or perhaps she will choose to show it to no one at all. Juri appears confident, controlled, and mature on the outside, but inside she hides a wounded heart she shows to no one. Lockets hang over a person’s chest—the location of her heart—just as the person contained in the locket is close to the person’s heart. The locket’s golden chain locks Shiori’s picture around her neck, as her love for her friend locks her in perpetual childhood. 

She tries to rid herself of the locket, but she fails because she is unable to let go of her feelings for Shiori, even when she seems to return them. Her development stagnates as she sinks into a perpetual state of childish hope and disappointment. This doesn’t imply that adults don’t hope or despair, but rather suggests that adults (at least well adjusted ones) cope with their joy and loss instead of letting it control their entire existence. The shattered locket forces her to cope, and by doing so, she is freed from her childish stagnation. She latter offers to put Utena’s picture in a new locket, but she no longer needs a place to hide her feelings and her dreams. She will neither be controlled by a locket nor the person inside it.

While neither as present as Miki’s stopwatch, nor as bazaar as Nanami’s bell, Juri’s locket is very important to her story. Part storytelling, part characterizing, this particular devise is a beautiful symbol of Juri’s pain, imprisonment, and eventual freedom.